A Problematic Enigma Inside Relationships.

A Problematic Enigma with Relationships.

By: J.N.V

 A problem I see a lot with relationships is that usually at the beginning, people present themselves in what I call: "society's acceptable ways". So people abandon themselves in pursuit of impressing others. This leads people to forgetting true values in life along with oneself.


The more they imitate a false identity, the more it becomes them. Lets say, you meet someone new. Shortly after; comes

This triggers the partners shadow , (suppressed self) and at times overpowers the ego (the mask-false identity) which ends up in a conflict between both. Often times, neither side would surrender. Other times one may surrender, but the other takes over; leaving them in a "stuck" situation where the other partner is in control. Then we have the common fallout of both sides.

It is very rare when people on both sides drop their guards and reveal their true selves in acceptance. (Main reason is the fear of losing control). However,  full  acceptance leads to forgiveness, because even though the mask was worn. The rarity of acceptance (the suppressed self wants acknowledgement) brings the radiance of unconditional love.(Or the re-opening of the heart)

Sometimes relationships that don't work out, however, usually brings a set of lessons to learn and apply (to-create-action). Reason being, we don't want to make the same mistakes we did in the last.
marriage, kids, work etc... but during that relationship, the shadow, or suppressed self slowly peels off the mask, revealing itself to the partner.

These "failed" relationships, however; reveal  many things about ourselves, what we stand for and what our purpose is through our pains. This could either lead to being genuine, or falling out and having to repeat the same lesson, all over again.

Being genuine also means becoming your own best friend. If you aren't genuine how will you attract the right people in your life for you? There is always someone out there that matches your personality and frequency, like two pieces of a puzzle filling each other out.


What if, for example, you express your true thoughts and feelings, and someone passing by overheard them and sparked up a conversation with you in the middle of where ever you are?


Remember the following phrase, and remember it well.
"For one mans garbage, may be another ones treasure".

The choice is up to the individual. Whether to continue the cycle they are in, or repeat it by carrying the bricks of their unsolved inner conflicts into the next relationship.